I have wondered long and hard why we broke up. It was painful and frightening but necessary though I did not have the wits about me to realize at the time. Our timing was off, or so they say. We were far too different, a given I did not freely accept. I wanted to go on, but you did not. And that was where we parted ways.
“Things happen for a reason” is the mother of all clichés but a fact of life all the same. An ever present mantra that kept me going and hoping and persevering. On some days, it served as a coping mechanism that absolved me from any failure. God knows how much of a failure I felt. But the mind has its ways of making it all seem bearable until I just forgot how devastating it was to know that I was not the one you wanted.
I was smitten by your flamboyance and I revelled at your amusing light. You seemed so magical and free, a mystery that I would never be able to solve. You were the yin to my yang, opposites that were not destined to meet. You knew how much I was willing to give to break all chains and be with you. But as sure as the tides return to the ocean, it was never you and me. I wanted you all to myself, but you only belonged to the world. That was not something I was happy to embrace, yet I did… and everyday with you was a heartbreak.
We bid our farewells, lived our lives the best we could and set root in our separate plots of earth. Our vines intertwined every now and then, it helped me carry through the days of bleak. But I knew that we will never be one again. I finally found my place in the sun and grew branches solid and strong. I needed less and less of you, and craved more and more of me. It made me see how happy I was with my company. Until one day, I just broke free.
I could never forget that you happened. You were the bitter pill that made me stronger. We are allowed to be foolish once or twice in life, and I have been blessed with the opportunity to be foolish with you. When I thought I have given all that was good in me, I have surprised myself that I could smile even more, dream even more, care a little bit more. And it is in these little moments that I have come to terms with the fact that it did not work out with you because it never meant to.
There is someone for every person, they come to you at random points in life. They only become your person when you allow yourself to be theirs. While you did not end up being my person, you were the nudge that I needed to become one to mine. And for that, I am eternally grateful and can only wish you well.
– Inspired by (500) Days of Summer